Somewhere, Australia – Many warehouse associates, salesmen, and scooter riders are disregarding MGP’s company protocol on ‘bashing skulls’. MGP confirms firing warehouse associate Banjo Eioozak, salesmen ‘Twan’ Bustos, and riders Ryan Williams, and whoever else is on that team cause no one has any idea other than the people within the organization.
MGP has a strict ‘bashing skulls’ policy. In MGP’s company worker establishment packet it says in article Vag-420.69: “You will never hate on the skull, you will accept the skull, you won’t ever want to change from the skull, you will become the skull. If you go against the skull you go against us. PS you’ll be fired.”
Banjo Eioozak, 27, sleeps in his local skateparks bowl, was one of MGP’s best warehouse workers. Working there for over 5 years and having to stare at the horrible green skull logo every day finally caught up to him. He showed up to work on May 21st and got Ice’d by Madd’s founder Mike Horne. He chugged that shit in 3 seconds and everyone was hyped. Banjo ripped his shirt off and smashed the glass all over the floor. He was so fucking hyped, but then, he saw it again, the green skull, it immeidately made it so fucking bummed that a big player in the sport uses this as their logo when they could do something or ANYTHING different. He said, “fuck this skull it looks like shit and we gotta change it”. Mike immediately fired him without pension or 2 week pay leaing Banjo to rot since he doesn’t have insurance on the skate park bowl and you never know the Funk Bros might come around and fill it with cereal. Fucking gross.
When asked Banjo what he liked about working at the warehouse he said.
“The warehouse was kinda tight. We got to drink beers on the job and drop acid which made the skulls move, truly the only time I liked the damn logo. I got along with everyone, but the company has no idea what’s cool and doesn’t want anything to do with being cool. They block websites, Instagram pages, etc. of other scooter companies at the warehouse because they don’t want us or the design team to get inspired to make something that doesn’t look like shit or weigh 100 pounds.”
I asked Banjo what he plans to do next.
“Gonna move to California and work full time for Fuzion”
Oh come on man from one to the other? Some people just don’t get it!
Another former worker who got fired for the 2nd or possibly the 3rd time, who the fuck is counting anyways huh bud, is ‘Twan’ Bustos. Twan has actually been irrelevant for sometime in the sport now so we’re just gonna go ahead and skip this section of the post, but we’ll let him get one word in.
“Any scooter company out there please hire me, please. I’ll do anything. I swear this time I’ll actually do my job, not steal product, and get even more colorful meaningless tattoos if you ask me to. Andrew Broussard I know we had a rough past, but please man. Remember the good times when I rode Ryan Shecklers local when the Gold SCS came out and we we’re buds. Please take me back I can make Proto…” Gonna have to stop you there Twan see ya later.
Ryan fucking Williams who recently quit MGP, SIKE, he got fired, kinda. It was a mutual decision he said. I asked him what leaving Madd Gear was all about. He said “I had no idea I was on MGP and once I realized I was on MGP I quit MGP.” Wait wtf?
This has been an issue for a long time we discovered. Even years ago Coedie Donovan got booted off the team for absolutely hating the skull. He was OK with it at first, but when those MGP/Elyts copy cat shoes came out, he was done. (WARNING: THE IMAGE BELOW IS SO FUCKING DISGUSTING YOU MIGHT WANT TO STOP READING NOW)
WHAT THE FUCK ARE THOSE OH MY GOD MY EYES ARE BLEEDING. WHO BOUGHT THESE. AND THEY CAME IN MULTIPLE COLORS…….. NOOOOOOOOO!!!
Are you working for Madd Gear? Do you want out or need help recovering from disgusting skull logo syndrome. We can help. There are other teams, other companies out there that need YOUR help! All you have to do is literally look everywhere else other than Walmart. Juzzy please this is a call out to you man please we’re begging you there’s gotta be someone out there that’ll hook you up with a nice deal. TSI? Proto? TILT? Flavor? Addict? Come on guys please help this man FUCK.
The question isn’t are you MADD enough. The questions is, are you mentally stable enough to not rip your eyes out when looking at that skull and all the crazy ass colors that come with it?